10/3/10 – Beautiful Day in the Ozarks

This morning I was tempted to stay over in Springfield, MO to relax and take care of necessities like laundry and getting a haircut. Instead, I decided to get a late checkout, go take care of business, and then head northwest to KC for Jack Stack’s world famous BBQ . Jack Stack is on my personal Bucket List and it’s one of the few BBQ joint’s that has a 4-star ZAGAT rating. I decided to starve myself today to ensure the BBQ tonight will be an extra special treat. Breakfast was a bagel, coffee and juice.

I started my laundry at the motel and headed out to get a haircut. I soon found a Supercuts and was shocked that there were no Vietnamese hairdressers. After a transformation from my Hippie-biker look, I stopped at a Kum & Go to gas-up and get my 4th pair of cheap sunglasses so far. Somehow, I lost my sunglasses again yesterday. After I told the clerk that Kum & Go sounds like a drive-thru sperm bank, he told me the company held a contest to name their new designer coffee; the overwhelming favorite was “Kum-Cup“, but Corporate decided to go with the safer distant second choice of “Go-Cup”. I’m not making this up.

I hit the road at around 12:30 under crystal clear blue skies, cool temperature and a light northern breeze. Perfect! I’ve seen signs most of yesterday for the “Fantastic Caverns” and I’m usually not a sucker for superlatives, but today I was only planning to ride around 200 miles and I had time to burn, so what the heck. The 5 mile ride to the caverns on a quaint, beautiful Ozark road was worth the $22 price of admission. I was expecting something akin to the World’s biggest ball of yarn, but was very pleasantly surprised that these caverns are truly Fantastic! They were discovered by a guy in the 1,700’s when his dog chased a varmint into the cave. He was afraid to explore it so he hired 12 ladies from the Springfield Athletic Club to explore it for him. During the Civil War, it was used as a hide-out. During Prohibition, a steam generator was used to light it up and it became a Speak-Easy Casino and Bar until 2 guys a girl and a gun resulted in a dead man and the Sheriff closed it down. The KKK occupied it for a dozen years before it was turned into a venue for Hillbilly concerts for performers like Buck Owens and the Buckaroos. A rich family finally bought the place and turned it into a tourist attraction that’s one of only four caverns in the world that has motorized tours. It’s amazing to think that the stalactites and stalagmites form at a maximum rate of 1 inch per century.

It was 3:00 by the time I hit the road towards the promised land of Jack Stack. It was a pleasant ride, despite all the road work; lots of oak, hickory, lakes and rivers, with a few trees that are changing color. The notable scenic items in Missouri are the numerous Bible Colleges and strangely named churches like the Baptist Church of the Sacred Bleeding Heart of Jesus.

When I arrived at my motel, there was a Harley parked in front with a CA license plate. I met big Jim at the front desk and he’s a model airplane pole racer from Cupertino, CA. We chatted for awhile and I’m hopeful he’ll teach me to fly when we get back to CA. I watched the first quarter of the Sunday night game and then headed 7 miles west to Jack Stack for the treat of a lifetime!

When I arrived at around 9:00, Jack’s was closed. I felt like Chevy Chase arriving at Wally World. Are you kidding me? The world’s best BBQ joint is closed at 9:00 and I’m starving. It turn’s out the entire Bible Belt shuts down on Sundays. Don’t they know that the Sabbath is Saturday?

I had to settle for a Whopper tonight, but I will eat at Jack Stack tomorrow.