9/4/10 – Big Rectangle States

Sorry for the delayed blog post. There’s no Internet connectivity in New Underwood, SD. When I asked Bubba if there was WiFi, he said no, we just have cable. I’m just happy to have a bed to sleep in tonight and I’ll tell you why later.

Have you ever wondered why Wyoming and adjacent states are giant rectangles with no particular geographic features that demarcate their boundaries? No; Me neither. For a state with half the population of San Jose, it’s way too big. Who’s in charge defining state boundaries anyway? I think all states should be sized like Rhode Island or Delaware, so when you ride 450 miles in a day, you’ve seen 10 states instead of just one.

I slept like a baby last night and awoke bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to ride to the land of giant president’s heads. Unfortunately, the shower Gestapo have invaded Cody, WY and installed the most restrictive shower heads on earth! I’m not joking when I say that my shower tricked slower than an old man with a blown-out prostate. Halfway through rinsing, I seriously considered getting out and calling the front desk for a late check-out so I could have enough time to rinse-off. As Americans, we have a constitutional right to a proper shower and it’s time to rise-up and write to your congressman before we all stink like the French! Have we learned nothing from the Vietnam Experience? Communism and Fascism are like a row of stacked dominos; it starts with low-flow shower heads, but quickly escalates to banning plastic grocery bags and socialized medicine! Then, before you realize what’s happening, an Islamic Socialist, pretending to be Christian, is occupying the Oval Office and he’s spending trillions of your great grandchildren’s tax dollars on autobahns in places where there are no people. You probably think this could never happen in America, but remember that Hitler started by building great autobahns and Wyoming has great new autobahns. Remember: “Those who do not learn from the past are doomed to repeat it.” Write your congress-person before they plug-up your shower!

Anyway, the people in Wyoming are extremely nice. The lady in the motel listened patiently as I explained the communists behind the low-flow shower heads. She said she would look into it, but I know she won’t. She did give me a great tip for brunch; she suggested the Sunset House and it was fantastic! I had the turkey, Swiss and avocado on a croissant with a cup of ham and navy been soup that was the best I’ve ever had. I was tempted to speak with the chef to get the soup recipe, but I wanted to get riding. The elderly waitress saw my maps and offered me advice for my route to Mt. Rushmore. After she left, a young woman eavesdropper came over to my booth and offered me some advice; “Are you driving an RV she asked?” I pointed to my helmet on the table and said, no. I said they were nice, not bright or attractive. She warned me that the mountains were steep and winding and I told her that’s what I live for. I think she thought I was nuts.

The 400+ mile ride through WY to Rapid City, SD was fantastic; lots of grassy plains, flat-topped plateaus, buttes, mountains and rocky canyons. Many areas looked like the Painted Desert in AZ, with alternating layers of red rock and white limestone. WY is truly as geologist’s wet dream. The weather today toggled between 90degrees and mostly cloudy to 60’s and mostly cloudy. The heat was not bad with all vents open on my jacket, but I stopped every 100 miles to rehydrate with a quart of Gatorade at WY’s version of 7-11, called Kum and Go [I’m not making this up]. I know, Kum and Go sounds like a drive through sperm bank, but it’s really just a 7-11 with gas for $2.68.9. In short, it was a great ride until I got to Rapid City, SD.

It turns out that Labor Day weekend is the biggest thing in Rapid City other than the Livestock Convention and there were no vacancies anywhere. Rapid City swells from 67,000 to over 100,000, as everyone flocks to the Meca to bask in the swimming pool at the Econolodge. I stopped at a dozen or more motels, Inns and Hotels and all were booked solid. It was now 9:30 and I was seriously considering riding on 330 miles to Sioux City. I rode east 30 miles and stopped in New Underwood, SD [Pop. 400].

New Underwood has just one paved street [A Avenue] and a convenience store called Steve’s Superstore that has a mini-mart, a restaurant, a gas station, a Laundromat, a 7-room motel and the world’s smallest biker bar. I stopped at Steve’s and met Richard, his wife Wilma-Mae and Grandpa who were drinking beer on the porch of the store. I asked if there was a motel in town and Grandpa said he’s check with Grandma to see if there were any available rooms. Unfortunately, there were none. Richard invited me to join them for a beer and it sounded really good after a long ride and no place to sleep. I went in to Steve’s and bought a beer and sat down to chat with the gang. Richard offered to let me sleep in his Ford Expedition or a cot in his trailer. A kind gesture, but I’d sooner ride all night than sleep in toothless-Richard's truck. Richard and Wilma-Mae are high school sweethearts and they told me lots of stories about their boys. One son just joined the Maries and is in Boot Camp at Camp Pendleton, CA. Wilma has never been west of Buffalo, WY and she is looking forward to traveling to CA to see her son graduate from Boot Camp. I went back into Steve’s to get another beer and Bubba, the kid at the counter, said one person has not shown-up for their room reservation and if they didn’t show in 15 minutes, I could have the room. At 11:00, I got the room and was saved from an all night ride though SD. I was relieved and the room was comfortable, but no Internet - sorry.

I also included a picture in this post of Ann and Wild Bill's birthday dinner party at the Villages Clubhouse.

Good night.